Category Archives: My Opinion

The New York Times Said the Upper West Side Was Stylish So It Must Be True, Right?

Models frolic in Lincoln Center during Fashion’s NIght Out

Hi everyone! I know it’s been seven months since I’ve written anything here, but I’ve been inspired by the New York Times to take up the proverbial pen again. (Plus Avi at the WestSideRag  gave me a nudge.)  On Tuesday they published this article titled “Intersection: Upper West Side Style Is Quiet But Far From Mute.”  Quiet?? I have been screaming my head off for a year that the Upper West Side has style.

So maybe I should be thankful that the NYT deigned decided to highlight our sad little ass-backwards ‘hood. Except I think they did more harm than good. Let’s analyze: Continue reading

Upper West Side Contender For “Hot ‘Hood of 2011″

15 Central Park West

The January/February edition of Manhattan magazine just arrived this week. As I was flipping past features on $150 hair conditioner, I landed on an article entitled, “Hot ‘Hoods of 2011.” The number one contender listed? Yes, the Upper West Side.

As I started reading, I got more and more uncomfortable. The article is set up with a “goal”, “the game plan”, and “next year expect” sections for each neighborhood. Our goal as a neighborhood, according to Manhattan? “Stop being a poorer, less interesting version of the Upper East Side.” Um. What?

Poorer, maybe. Less interesting? HAHAHAHA! They may have more museums and better shopping on the UES, but I can assure you, the residents are hardly more interesting. Good lord. And we have Riverside Park. And Zabar’s.  And Fairway. (OK, I’m not sure I’m supporting my argument very well here. )

Then it goes on about the old money loving the Apthorp and crazy money loving 15 CPW. Yeah, $10,000/square foot apartments really make a neighborhood hot.

Finally, it talks about the celebs moving here. Apparently Sting, A-Rod, and Denzel Washington live at 15 CPW. Of course Madonna lives up here, too. SJP is still scouting apartments on the UWS. And I did not know this, but Lady Gaga is a partner in Vince & Eddie’s (70 W. 68th St, nr. Columbus).

If all this equals “hot”, I’d rather be lukewarm.

Read the full article here.

Floorplan for penthouse at 15 CPW

Happy New Year! Now Go Do Something Big in 2011….

Please indulge me today and allow me a little narcissistic introspection.

It’s that time of the year again, when we’re supposed to take stock of the previous year and set goals for the year to come. Normally I drink some champagne on New Year’s Eve and make a lame vow to finally lose five pounds or cook more homemade meals. 2010-2011 feels different, though.

After deciding that a few toxins needed to be removed this morning, I headed to Omar’s Powerstrike class (Equinox, 76th and Amsterdam) and punched and kicked the demons (and maybe that five pounds??) away. Afterwards, I started resolving.

There’s a website called 43Things, in which you are supposed to list your resolutions and people will support you in reaching your goals. I suspect some people aren’t entirely serious about the site, like the guy who listed “get my wife to cuckold me.” I can really get behind the person who wants to “get rid of the clogged pores on my face,” though. Anyway, I figured that I already have a platform from which to overshare my deepest, darkest wishes, so here are a few for 2011: Continue reading

“Lots of Men Love An Ample Bum”

Kim Kardashian, who has displaced J. Lo as queen of bootyliciousness

I was at Cafe Luxembourg (200 W 70th Street) having a mellow dinner with friends the other night. If you’ve never been there, there is a photograph hanging in the bathrooms (same photo in the men’s and women’s) that seems to provoke a lot of discussion whenever I’m there.

The photo is of three nude women standing at the Cafe Luxembourg bar with their backs–and bare bottoms–to the camera. The picture is finished in sepia and  is supposed to look like a vintage snap. I’m pretty sure it’s not, but perhaps I’m wrong.

The nudity is not the issue here. The issue is the size of the women’s asses. The last time I was there, one of the guys I was with went on about the picture of “fat women in the bathroom.” I took immediate issue with him, because THEY ARE NOT FAT. He and others at the table argued that, indeed, their butts were big. Perhaps. It hit a little close to home, since I have a rather curvaceous posterior, too. I’m athletic and fit, but my ass won’t budge. It does its own thing. So is a rounder, curvier butt attractive or a liability? Continue reading

Am I An Old Prude or Is Victoria’s Secret Just Trashy?

I would consider these if they came in a thong version

I was walking down Broadway and I stopped into the Victoria’s Secret near 84th Street because I was hot as hell and needed to cool off. Plus there were a zillion people in there so I thought maybe something exciting was going on inside. I am never one to pass up a retail event.

There wasn’t anything going on. Just people shopping maniacally for lingerie and panties. I felt like I was in a cartoon and there were brightly colored dainties flying everywhere. Continue reading

Nautical Stripes. I Like Them.

While perusing my closet for something to wear–which is something I spend WAAAYYYYY too much time doing–I decided to take an inventory of all my striped clothing. It came in at an impressive 27. Yes, 27 pieces of striped clothing, mostly black and navy with a couple orange outliers.

I’m clearly addicted to this pattern. There’s something about the crisp, graphic nature of it that draws my eye. I immediately take anything striped off the racks in stores, and can usually justify buying it with the argument to my more pragmatic self: “Yes, I know it’s striped, but the shape is so different from any of the other 26 pieces you already own.” As evidenced VERY CLEARLY by this picture:

From L->R: See by Chloe dress, J.Crew tissue dress, J.Crew silk dress, Zara paper bag dress, Zara blazer (blatant Givenchy rip-off), Generra patchwork striped dress

Obviously this is a small sampling of my extensive collection. But you can see the differences, right?? My pragmatic self is so dumb sometimes. Continue reading

Sex and the City 2: Worst Movie Ever??

Maybe I’m being overly dramatic with that headline, but it was a dreadful movie. As in, you should be full of dread the minute you sit down in your seat.

Much has been written about the movie this morning. By far the best review comes courtesy of Lindy West. Do read it. You’ll “spew,” as one commenter shared.

Here are my random thoughts:

-Blatantly anti-Muslim and not funny. The treatment of women in these countries is not a joke. Nor is flaunting another country’s rules and traditions.

-I try not to bash other women for their looks. (Well, at least not in public). But SJP looked like a complete tranny for the entire movie. Her body is hawt, but her face, especially when rimmed with kohl and bronzer, is nawt. Continue reading

How Dare She Diss Lady Gaga AND Madonna!

I was reading the latest issue of New York Magazine (May 24 issue) on the long, crowded subway ride from Nolita to the UWS when I came across this tidbit:

“Joanna Newsom told the Guardian last week, among other things, that while Gaga’s approach to image is interesting, ‘you listen to the music, and you just hear glow sticks…I’m like, fair enough: She is the new Madonna, but Madonna’s a dumb-ass!’”

Well, you can just imagine the indignation on my face. First of all, who the hell is Joanna Newsom? Does she have a song anywhere near as brilliant as “Vogue” or “Paparazzi”?? No, I didn’t think so.

Does she wear Diet Coke cans in her hair, cone bras, or custom-made Armani? No, I didn’t think so.

She’d best leave the UWS divas alone or I may be forced to go medieval on her little hipster indie ass.

*STOMPS AWAY*

It’s Croc Season

The season of the Ugg is behind us and that of the Croc is imminent. You all don’t know me well enough yet, so I’ll say this: If there’s a shoe I hate more than the Ugg, it’s the Croc. (Now my bias is fully disclosed).

I’ve been accused of being snobby about shoes, and now I’ll reveal that I’m also slightly hypocritical. My boys wear Crocs. They’re good pool/beach/summer shoes. On children, they’re cute. On adults, they are  tragic clown shoes. Continue reading

An Open Letter to UWS Moms

Alexander Wang SS2010 runway look

Dear UWS Moms,

I know you’re all very busy, overwhelmed, and stressed out. I am, too. I work part-time, am doing an internship, and have two active boys. But I’d like to respectfully make a request.

Please stop wearing your workout clothes all day.

I know those Lululemon pants are comfortable. I know they make your ass look spectacular. But they’re doing nothing for your self-confidence.

And lest you think I’m being high and mighty, I wear my workout clothes to school drop-off at least 3 days a week. There are days when I want to just toss on another pair of sweats after a workout  or even just leave on what I wore to spin class that day. Ewww. Indeed, I did this for a solid year after my second son was born. I stopped succumbing to these urges. Continue reading