Why Must Halloween Be So Tarty??

Sexy Ghostbuster? REALLY?

As I’ve mentioned before, I love Halloween. I have dressed up every year since I was a kid wearing my mom’s homemade clown and angel costumes. In college and beyond, it got a little darker. I was Uma from Pulp Fiction, complete with huge syringe sticking out of my sternum. One year MILo and I horrified my mother by going as JFK and Jackie O–post-assassination. I had a lot of fake blood all over my pink pillbox hat. This year, of course, I’m going as Gaga, but would like to note that I will not be sans pants and no cleavage will be visible. (Not that I have cleavage.)

I’m sort of horrified by how costume shops market really slutty costumes to women. It’s a question of which came first, chicken or egg? Do women WANT to wear these “ho”-rrific costumes because it gives them a chance to let loose and be something they aren’t in real life? Or do they wear them because some huge misogynistic costume conglomerate has somehow convinced us that dressing like a Naughty Nurse/Slutty Nun is cool?

A classy seasonal top, as seen at an UWS Strawberry store

As we were wandering around costume shops looking for suitably cool ninja costumes for my two boys, Five came looking at women’s costumes with me. “Mommy, that’s a pretty dress!” It was basically Streetwalker Cinderella, a woman wearing a tight blue, short satin dress with garter belts decked with blue bows. Er, pretty.

I’m all for personal expression, dressing to feel attractive, and yes, even sexy. But please, let’s not walk around looking like we just hopped off the cover of Maxim. Much better to be  Drunk Snooki or pretend you have leprosy with some gnarly fake wounds or something. Halloween should be about gore, not T&A.

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